Friday, October 17, 2008

I Can't Make This Stuff Up

Chef Who Stabbed, Seasoned Victim Guilty of Murder




No, he didn't stab a seasoned victim. He stabbed him, then seasoned him.
Might have cooked him up a little, and chewed on him.

20 comments:

The Spiteful Chef said...

That is genuinely repulsive. I hope he wasn't using a good finishing olive oil, at least.

Choosy Beggar Tina said...

That's almost as good as the sausage burglers. I love how at the end, I can almost see him shrugging and saying, "meh. Well, I *MAY* have eaten just a little bit.....but it wasn't very good" Does that reflect more on the quality of the victim or his cooking prowess?

namastenancy said...

Is there a 12-step program for wanna' be cannibals?

bb said...

He should have pulled out the Le Creuset and braised him. That is always better. Um, so I've heard.......

Nikki said...

Straight up Titus Andronicus, right there.

Zoomie said...

We're channeling each other again, this time on the cannibal reference. That post will be up soon over here. Weird.

Greg said...

crazy!

cookiecrumb said...

Spitey: I'd hate to think he squandered the truffles.

Tina: What's funny is that both of these criminals spiced their victims! I do not share this gene.

Nancy: You wanna be a cannibal? Yeesh!

bb: Ah. So you've heard of "long pig." Delicious.

Nikki: Literary culinary debacle.

Zoomie: Can't wait to see!

Greg: Oh, like you've never thought of this. :D

kudzu said...

Sweeny, where are you??

Chilebrown said...

Yes, you are 'Twisted, Sister, Lepord, Death. We are going to make the Alemany, Mission District, and the Ferry Plazza Loop tomorrow. Did you get the 'killer hot sauce?
I am getting up at Midnight to start some killer pulled pork.

Dagny said...

I'm just speechless.

Anna Haight said...

How do you find these?! Wilder yet than the sausage caper. Something to keep us amused until the end of an error (1/20/2009).

cookiecrumb said...

Kudzu: I know. I want to write lyrics.

ChileBrown: Nutso, I know. Hey, the habanero sauce has not been available, but they promise they'll have it next Thursday. We must make arrangements!

Dagny: You are never speechless. ;)

Anna: Thank you for your intelligent political support. And... I find these stories in the newspapers!!

dancingmorgan mouse said...

You know, not so very long ago, in the highlands of New Guinea, "Long Pig" meant, people! So, it the chap was a chef, perhaps he seasoned the other cap with some caraway and sage.

dancingmorgan mouse said...

Bah - Curses on non-coffee fueled typing - So, IF the chap was a chef, perhaps he seasoned the other CHAP with some caraway and sage.

Zoomie said...

Reminds me of the hilarious song by Swann and Flanders called "The Reluctant Cannibal."

cookiecrumb said...

Morgan: I KNOW. Long pig. Human. Tasty. (Apparently.) I'd choose cilantro and garlic. Heh.

Zoomie: How reluctant am I these days?

altadenahiker said...

On second thought, maybe I'll take my tent somewhere else. I think I'm turning vegetarian.

Era said...

Speaking of chef murders, did you read about the one that happened on the Greek Island of Santorini? (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article4458746.ece) I was there a few days before it happened!!

cookiecrumb said...

Hiker: Oh, you'll be safe in my backyard. Lots of squash and tomatoes out there, and I wouldn't stab you.

Era: Oh, jeezez! Absolutely hideous. Aren't humans the most vile creatures?