Sunday, March 27, 2011

Bastard Cole Slaw

I probably am not the only one to think of this, but I did dream it up myself, so I'm taking credit.
A few weeks ago, a couple of serious meat talents got together to practice some skills on the grill and in the Dutch oven. (I am not naming names. You bastards know who you are.)
These great people — I really like them — made a public, online, impromptu invitation to a mutual friend of ours to join them. I just KNEW my invitation was coming! I even decided what food I would make to bring.
Well, I guess that email got swept under the rug, because I had to stay home and eat canned beans all alone on the day of the gathering.
Here's what you didn't get: Kimchi cole slaw. Yes, and it was delicious. Fiery, nasty, awesome. Homemade kimchi in there, as a matter of fact. Aren't you sorry now?
Well, here's how to put some together yourself. Slice "normal" cabbage (round, smooth kind), both colors if ya got 'em. Slice some of your kimchi — not a lot, it's hot, but you guys like hot stuff, so use your judgment — and stir that in with some of the juice.
With me so far? You bastards. Then scoop out some tahini. You don't have to mix it up if it's separated; just grab some oil from the jar, and some good solid lumps too. Stir that in with the cabbagey ribbons.
Finally, add a dash of vinegar. I used rice vinegar, to keep it a little Asian-y. Taste, adjust, enjoy.
It sounds good, doesn't it? It's THIS good: You ever do a popper and your head just snaps back (good thing you're in a chair) and you are washed with pleasure? That good.
You bastards.

19 comments:

Kailyn said...

That will show them for forgetting your invite. And now I am going to dream of kimchi.

cookiecrumb said...

Hey, Kailyn: Hah. You know what bastards I'm talking about.
I love kimchi. Adore the stupid stuff from the grocery store, but it's getting really expensive. I was so stoked to learn how easy, stress-free, it is to make at home.

Amy Sherman said...

Sriracha is so yesterday. Kimichi is where it's at baby! Anything and everything is better with kimichi. Quesadillas? Reuben sandwiches? Chicken soup? You betcha.

cookiecrumb said...

Amy: Oh, drool! Korean tacos, easy-peasy. Cranky is so horny for kimchi, he's going to make the next batch himself.
(You know who at least one of the bastards is, too. Rhymes with Wiggles.)

Greg said...

Add crazy colorful to all the other adjectives. April says it has the colors of a Monet painting.Rock on girl!

cookiecrumb said...

Greg: Oh, that's very nice! April, Monet's haystacks, eh? Always thought of those paintings as a bit psychedelic.

Little Pots & Pans Co. said...

Oooo kimchi quesadillas, I'm with Amy! CC you can bring that on over to my house any night, with dishes like this, those peeps should know better than to slight you :-)

cookiecrumb said...

Pots: Isn't Amy good? Recipe developer queen, she is. And. My peeps been dissed; they know that! :D Still friends, 'cuz that's how I rock and roll.

Chilebrown said...

Wow, that Cole Slaw sounds very good. I hope you know I did not have anything to do with the guest list. It was held at the "Red Bearded One's" abode. You know what? I am a bastard. I wish we could have tried that slaw.

Zoomie said...

That'll make 'em sorry, for sure. Gorgeous colors in there!

cookiecrumb said...

Chile: You could have got me in. "I'm with the band." Pshaw. That bearded one... what we gonna do? You both would have liked the slaw. There will be another time. (Be sure to tell him about this post, OK?)

Zoomie: Let's out you now. You were the lucky invitee. Yes, they are sorry!

Rev. Biggles said...

OH, Yup, that's me. I'm the bastard, I'll take my lumps, I deserve it. Was still in my funk and the night before still hadn't invited anyone. In fact, didn't even have a thing or a thought to cook until the very morning of the day.

Meathenge is getting VERY close to a complete redesign and have nearly found some inspiration for some posts even. Still not sure which direction I will pursue with a total in attendance for meals of 1.

I'm getting there. Slowly.

xo, Biggles

cookiecrumb said...

Biggles: First of all, I just realized "Biggles" rhymes with "giggles," so that's good. And with "wiggles"; even better.
It's really good to hear you have plans for your blog. It's sad to hear you are sad, Dr. Jiggles. xoxo

undercover caterer said...

Well, I didn't get invited to any parties either but I'm definitely adding kimchi to my next batch of cole slaw. What a great idea!

cookiecrumb said...

Undercover: You might think I'm bragging up this mess just to make those men jealous. But it was that good! I'm thrilled you might try. :)

Shine said...

Oh you guys are making me laugh this morning!! I am sorry you missed a feast, but happy for your inspiration Cookie. I think this would go wonderfully for our supper, on a bit of pulled pork sandwiches. This sounds brilliant-thanks!

cookiecrumb said...

Shine: ExACTly right! Why I thought it would be welcome at a meat party. Thanks, hon.

Cali said...

I don't like kimchi, but that poppers reference really took me back. Light em up dance floors, throbbing base lines (and other things,) hot, sweaty, writhing bodies pressed together so tightly that one couldn't possibly fall down and drop the Rush, or Steel(e), whatever. Oh yeah. The "Golden Years" between high school and marriage. Good times. Haven't thought about poppers for years. Can one even buy that stuff still? (Extremely thankful I had enough brain cells to blow a few thousand.) Thanks for the great memories.

cookiecrumb said...

Cali: OMG, are you the only one to get that reference? heart, heart
I have no idea if you can get those things nowadays, because, of course, I was merely talking about stuffed jalapenos. wink, wink