But, no. I'm tending to necessitudes, like mailing off a wedding present. Dumb store didn't even have the imagination to wrap it festively, so I'm doing that too. After a trip to the festive store.
If you've even read this far, here's what the old dude on the beach and I have to tell you.
Don't Use Soap. (When you shower; it's fine for your greasy dishes.)
Oh, and of course you can use some soap "here and there" for freshness, yome sane? Your armpits, hm?
But for the rest of your body, just get wet and scrub with a washcloth. It takes off the schmutz and the dead skin and the graffiti and bedbugs. (Eek! Kidding.)
(Do people still have washcloths? You could use a loofah mitt. But be advised, it'll need to be laundered every couple of showers.)
For your face, use a special face scrubber pad from the store if you want, but no soap. The residual makeup and whatever else you put on your skin will wash away, along with the day's pollutants.
Seriously. Your skin will feel dewy, not chemically and dry.
I've been doing this for a few weeks now, and I'm happy.
Nobody recoils in horror.