Friday, November 07, 2008

Gratificational Burp Breath

Oh, big deal. Somebody's lunch.
Yepth, an impromptu casserole of cute, twisted noodles, homegrown broccoli florets, and a good grating of Gruyère cheese. Some butter to help it all stir through.
But here's the deal. We have a jar of truffle salt (Williams-Sonoma will happily provide you with some for a generous fee). And we thought: Would that taste good on this silly, homely bake?
We thought it would, but we decided to wait until it was cooked, and then make up our minds.
By the time the casserole came out of the oven, though, we realized we had created the flavor of truffle. It's in the cheese, it's in the broccoli, it's even in the pasta. We baked a dish of truffle flavor. Chemical synergy.
Did we put truffle salt on it?
Hell yes.


dancingmorganmouse said...

OOOh, yumm. Our broccoli is steadfastly refusing to floret - how long must I wait?

Anna Haight said...

I'm finding broccoli very tasty this season! In fact, I may plant some... Truffle salt, I'll have to look for that!

Katie said...

Life is too short to use half-ass ingredients.

Hell yes.

The Spiteful Chef said...

They have truffles at our whole foods right now; black ones from Oregon. I want to buy them, even though I've never had them, but then I get all anxious about spending that much on something I might not love, and something that may not be the same as the French product. Woe is me.

Heather said...

I hope you can take it like you dish it. Something tells me you can't. Get ready for a long four years. Of course you'll probably delete this because "hate speech" is anything that liberals disagree with.


So, now that they’ve won, liberals want to be all conciliatory and “unite” with us in a spirit of cooperation and “love,” do they?

Bite me, c***suckers. Who do you think you’re fooling with this touchy-feely crap, anyway? The fact is, for the past eight years (a lot longer than that, truth be told) you’ve accused us of being Nazis, hatemongers, racists, bigots, xenophobes, homophobes, jingoistic flag-wavers, baby-killers, imperialists, troglodytes, “extra-chromosome” retards, and more. You’ve threatened to assassinate our elected leadership. You’ve claimed that two elections were “stolen” even as all empirical evidence has said otherwise. You’ve called for kangaroo-court trials for an elected leadership whose only “crime” was taking measures you disapproved of to defend the country you despised until Tuesday night. You’ve spouted diseased hatred for your political opponents and your countrymen. You’ve not passed up even the merest opportunity to complain, resist, protest, vilify, and demonize.

And now you think we all ought to just forget all that and let bygones be bygones? That your heavenly righteousness ought to magically exempt you from getting a little of your own thrown back at you — just because your guy won, and you finally realize what a revolting spectacle you’ve made of yourselves as you sought to undermine your country, its soldiers, and a war we didn’t start but vowed to finish with a victory over those who brought it to our doorsteps? You think that because you won an election, those of us who actually still cherish our nation’s founding ideals ought to just humbly line up in solidarity with those who will seek to turn America into something the Founders not only wouldn’t recognize or approve of, but would actually recoil in horror from?

Newsflash: Not. Gonna. Happen.

Take your phony “reconciliation,” glue some razor blades to the sides of it, grease it up with Cosmoline, and jam it straight up your fundament. We already know how long this newfound spirit of bipartisan “healing” will last: it will end the moment any one of us dares to express disagreement with even the least of the Redeemer’s policies. It will end the moment some conservative speaks out against kneecapping the military by cutting budgets and running from Afghanistan or Iraq. It will end the moment one of us protests the suppression of political speech you disagree with. It will end the moment the least of us has the temerity to suggest that the money we earn by the sweat of our brow is and ought to be ours to dispose of as we see fit, and not the government’s to seize and redistribute in the name of “fairness.”

It will last exactly as long as we kneel at the feet of your most puissant Lord and ask forgiveness for having sinned against Him, and not a moment longer. It will last about as long as the condescending sympathy expressed for our country in the wake of 9-11 did, and be every bit as shallow and false.

Your expressions of solidarity and a wish for reconciliation have the same stink of hypocrisy, the same underlying “or else” threat, that your Marxist Messiah’s calls for unity always have. Sure, you all want unity — the soothing unity of groupthink and mindless obedience to authority. It’s just that now, YOU are Authority. What happened to “dissent is the highest form of patriotism,” anyway? I’ll tell you what happened: it got thrown overboard the moment you transitioned from cast-out losers howling at the gates of power to victorious tyrants dispensing favors, largesse, and orders from on high.

Keep your damned expressions of “love” in your f***ing pocket. Because we’re going to fight you every step of the way as you try to drag our country further into the socialist abyss. We’re not about to come over to your side, no matter how anxiously and transparently you plead with us not to do to your side precisely what your side has spent the last eight years doing to us."

Katie said...

Hmm. Liberals are the angry ones?

We Are Never Full said...

mmmmm. perfect! we make something kind of similar but we use short pasta (like penne) and we put a fried egg on top!

and to heather: go f*** yourself or find someone (or something) to f*** so you can chill out. we've already been through the longest 8 years in my life so nothing will ever come close to that. give him a chance to prove something to you and then you can rant like a crazy loon. he's not even started the job yet you nit.

The Spiteful Chef said...

Dude...Who is Heather, and why is she so batshit crazy? Doesn't it kind of sound like the ravings of someone who has been living in the woods of Montana for a very, very, very long time with nothing to keep her company but a squirrel she's named "Jesus" and twelve other various woodland disciples?

kudzu said...

Whooooooooosh. I'm trying to take a deep breath and not get into the "heather" confrontation, but what bothers me most is that she remains nameless and therefore safe from any response. Don't know why I call the writer "she" -- doesn't sound like a woman's style of harrangue. Ah, me.

Lets all eat some truffles and feel better.

cookiecrumb said...

Morgan: My plants are wimpy this year. I don't even know if they're a winter or a summer plant.

Anna: The terroir of Marin produces such sweet vegetables; I hope you give it a try.

Katie: I can economize somewhere else, dig?

Spiteful: They taste like socks. Like old laundry hamper. So, at the price they go for, you might spend a lot and hate them. You can probably tell how you'd like one by giving it a sniff. Intoxicating!

Heather: Wow! Astroturf hate spam.
I've never accused you of anything. Except being crazy. They have medicine for the kind of pain you're suffering from. Get help.
Oh, and you probably gel your hair with Cosmoline. Stinky!

Katie: Oh, shoot. I just wrecked it for liberals by calling Heather crazy.

Never Full: Egg on top! I have an egg-on-top idea in mind; thanks for the jog of menu memories.

Spiteful: Heather probably does her poopies on a newspaper and then sets fire to them, like the Unabomber.

Kudzu: I love not deleting that junk, so we can all read it. Hee.
Truffle salt! You only use a little, so it goes a lo-o-ong way for the $$.

dancingmorganmouse said...

Crikey, Heather needs some nice, soothign Broccoli Soup methinks!

kudzu said...

I think we deserve fresh truffles for putting up with that comment. There's a semi-soft Italian cheese with teensy bits of them in it that gives me my fix at this time of year. (Mollie Stone's) When I was in Italy my friend and I ate it for breakfast: here, I dole it out in judicious, small bites.

namastenancy said...

WOW! Heather is following the usual right-wing pattern that I've seen for decades - refuse responsibility, sling accusations and not leave a forwarding address. Maybe she needs a bit of truffle salt on her broccoli to sweeten her life?

melissa said...

You know, I've seen you around, so to speak, but this is my first comment. I have to laugh that I stepped into a little land mine on my initial click into the comment box. I'll practice avoidance in regards to that, heh.

I clicked though because I love this. This is something I would whip up for myself in a heartbeat - noodles, broccoli, gruyere, perfection. Truffle salt? Must hunt that down. Have only tried truffle oil, but it was a revelation.

Beautiful blog.

ModMan said...

I am a guy who lives in Denver, Co., I love cooking, wine, visiting a plethora of restaurants, theatre, good clothes great music and green gardening - if you were to profile me, what would you guess? I have a small business and my clients typically think I am a right leaning liberal (I am a builder and renovator specializing in modernist architecture). In all actuality I am a married (to the hottest woman in the world for 10 years), father of two beautiful girls and *gasp* a born again christian (please lose the typical *yawn* stereotype of the backwoods redneck, with moonshine and squirrels and mental instability - it is overused and quite annoying). Why do I say all of this? The foray that Heather has started and the responses from "the spiteful chef" and "we are never full" is what is typical of our socio-political climate. I will be truthful that as I was photo-grazing around the food blogs I came across this blog and was irritated. Only because I want to see unification of OUR America. We should all respect a persons opinions and convictions (yes, that includes a persons choice to be gay or otherwise). The thing that bothers me is that I take being an American seriously and that means I am interested in our nation being a unified country. I remember from the Carter admin. forward. It was not until the end of the Bush Sr. admin. on through Clinton, Geo. W. and now Obama that I have noticed a strong polarization that has turned America into a bunch of spiteful back biters breeding hate and discord. It does not matter what your political leaning is, NOT ONE PRESIDENT HAS DESTROYED AMERICA!!! Can we get over our differences and unite? I have had my guy in office (Reagan) and since then it has bounced back and forth from Democrat to Republican and on and on. What am I saying? No, I did not vote for Obama but we have to give him a chance to prove his mettle. I will not be posting any Obama countdown clocks on the internet - I will actually be waiting with hope over the next 4 years to see what he can do for us. If he fails (which will be largely a matter of opinion - hence the name opinion polls), then we will have the opportunity to replace him with someone else, until then let's give him a chance.

Note to I'm Mad and I Eat - think it is time to change the name of this blog? Maybe to a theme that will breed some kindness and love across the isle?

Moral of this extremely long comment: Lose the hate, appreciate everyones right to their convictions and start RESPECTING each other. WE ARE AMERICA, that is something to be proud of.

ModMan said...

So I write quite possibly the worlds longest blog comment and go cook breakfast for my family (eggs over easy on pugaliese toasts with pancetta and parmesan crisps with espresso - small taste of breakfast heaven) and I feel like I should make an addendum. My post was not so much as to offend as to vent on what I feel is an injustice - both as Heather was wrong so was "the spiteful chef" and "we are never full". I do not mean to offend, I just want to shift peoples paradigm to more of understanding and acceptance, isn't that what we all want.

So my apologise if I offended. Now, the elections are over so let's cook, eat and enjoy great fellowship!!!


peter said...

I'm the UnaBlogger, and I approve this message.

cookiecrumb said...

I got nuthin'.

liberal foodie said...

what a delicious looking dish! thanks for sharing the secrets of truffle salt on pasta, brocs and cheese. cookiecrumb hearts williams-sonoma. awwwwwww :)

to heather- really? REALLY!?! well we don't want crazies like you on our side anyway. you're better off over there, in the middle of nowhere with your best friends, the 3 children, 5 dogs, 2 cats, 17 chickens and the donkey. Can we all say sore looser?

cookiecrumb said...

Melissa: I'm happy you delurked, and thrilled that you "get" this flavor combination. Right now, I'm thinking I like truffle salt better than truffle oil.

Liberal Foodie: You too.

Peter: Ha.

cook eat FRET said...

wow. i ummm, like your pasta.