Monday, September 08, 2008

Fennely Felony

25 comments:

Mary Coleman said...

just decided I can't eat lunch and read your blog. It's just too dangerous for all concerned.
Rubbing one with spices and whacking the other with a sausage...and the evidence eaten by a dog.
God help me!!!

cookiecrumb said...

Mary: And it was only an 8-inch sausage!

Anna Banana said...

Send this to the New Yorker! Agree that having meat of any kind today is out of the question.

Anita (Married... with dinner) said...

oh, delicious irony. A-salt with a deadly banger.

Dagny said...

But what kind of spices? I mean the spice combination can make the world of a difference.

Zoomie said...

Anita, that's _too_ funny!

Cookiecrumb, neither sausage whacking nor spice-smearing is against the law, as far as I know. :-D

Rev. Biggles said...

Heh, a friend sent me a link to some online paper for that one. Some day, when I snap, you'll get another one of those.

Biggles

leena! said...

What they didn't tell you was that the dog thought the sausage could've used a little more salt.

cookiecrumb said...

Anna B: Well, I certainly don't think you should perform battery with meat and then throw it to the dogs!! My dog breaks out in "weirdness" if he eats cured meat.

Anita: Dang, where were you this morning when I needed a title?

Dagny: Guaranteed there was no vanilla in there.

Zoomie: But cowering half-naked in a field apparently is. :D

Biggles: We are here for you. Just call one of us if you find yourself feeling sausage-whacky.
(And now I'm regretting typing that.)

Leena: I wonder if they're holding the dog until its lab "evidence" can be (uh, rectally) produced.

Zoomie said...

My Beloved and I are howling with laughter as we read the comments and then your responses to said - this is a great post, Cookie, all the way around!

Michelle said...

You just made my WHOLE day! That's friggin' hilarious and I needed that! Thanks for the good laughs - I'm glad I have you to search out such things as this ;)

Anna Haight said...

Wow another unique "Fresno" angle. And I thought eating ostrich teppanyaki was the wildest thing there...

Lannae said...

I just laughed. Truth, it is stranger that fiction.

cookiecrumb said...

Zoomie: If I could find news stories like this every day, blogging would be easier.

Michelle: Search it out? It literally fell into my lap, in the morning paper.
You are welcome!

Anna: I still think eating ostrich teppanyaki in Fresno takes the prize. :)

Lannae: And I was *thisclose* to making my own sausage. Now I'm not sure I have the appetite for it.

The Spiteful Chef said...

Doesn't getting hit with a weiner (the culinary equivalent of a "mushroom slap" as the boys in high school called it) qualify more as sexual assault than B&E? I'm only asking because I've got some sausage in the refrigerator, some people who need slapping, and a desire to avoid having to register my residence with the Meghan's Law people.

Greg said...

That is far and away the funniest! Next thing you know there will be drive-by spicing all over the place.

cookiecrumb said...

Spiteful Chef: No, it's just a food fight. No harm, no foul. Slap away.

Greg: What a choice set of words. "Drive-by spicing."

Nik Snacks said...

Oh, my dirty little mind is going wild. I'll just end this here with um..er..I really don't care for sausage. I'd rather eat paste.

cookiecrumb said...

Nikki: Go back to Spiteful Chef and see the comment I left for her. She'll probably ban me from her blog. (But I doubt it.)

Tina said...

Now how would you call in sick from work on that one?
"Sorry boss, bandits broke into the house and savagely struck me with sausages."

I'm also surprised that only 1 dog appeared on the scene, I was expecting a canine pied piper!

cookiecrumb said...

Tina: Why are you not blogging? Such funny commentary!

Tina said...

Aw, thanks Cookiecrumb. I am blogging, I'm just a dope that doesn't know how to use a computer properly whilst leaving comments. I knew that year I spent being a Luddite when I was 17 would come back to haunt me...

cookiecrumb said...

Tina: And still, no link. You Luddite!!
:D

Mrs. L said...

I read this in the local SJ paper and had to reread it just to be sure it wasn't a prank!
And Anita's comment has me rolling on the floor!

Tina said...

(I am suitably cowed)

www.choosy-beggars.com!

One day I will learn how to use this "computing device" with an "interweb" thing for more than just word processing and spread sheets....